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Vibes Corner

Funny Ways African Parents Code #Sextalk With Their Kids
African Parents 101

Funny Ways African Parents Code #Sextalk With Their Kids 

African children, gather in here. We have suffered. Everything we know about sex was taught to us from everywhere except our parents and we need to talk about it.

The first time my mother and I ever had a frank sex talk, our neighbor’s daughter had gotten pregnant and my mum was terrified. The poor woman probably thought it was a bug in the air and I could catch it like a cough. My mum looked at me and said “Please don’t have sex. I can go down on my knees.” Yes, it was awkward.

I feel African mothers try compared to the dads. In the world that my father lives with me, sex doesn’t exist and I was given to him by the storks. However, later in life, when you hit that marriage age or sexual maturity age, SOME African dads go wild, especially with their sons and even ask for details (true story).

However, before that point, they try to fulfill their parental responsibilities and tell us about sex in the most boring ways possible. I’ve asked some of my friends and here were their responses:

THE RELIGIOUS PARENTS

These parents are the ones that will tell you that when you get married and have sex the right way, God watches over sex to bless it and that when an unmarried person has sex, the devil watches over it. I don’t know about you but both options are creepy.

THE THREATENING PARENTS

These ones will tell you that if you get pregnant or get a girl pregnant, they will disown you and throw you harsh. Very harsh something- aren’t children gifts from God again?

THE ‘TRUSTING’ PARENTS

They will come in like “Amaka just got pregnant o. they said it was Daniel that got her pregnant. I know it can never be my child.” Like, mummy what are you trying to tell me?

THE CONSPIRACY THEORY PARENTS

I like these set of parents. They are the ones that will tell you that you have a bright future and that EVERY member of the opposite sex is from the coven of the devil trying to snatch your glory.

How did your parents talk to you about sex?

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